I am 30

and for some reason I am NOT freaking out and THAT is freaking me out.

Bah !

last weekend of my 20's.

bah !

it all happens for a reason ...

right ?

read two books in 3 days. M deleted me from Facebook. S is in the city and didn't bother getting in touch. I didn't go the gym. Again. Haven't smoked in over a month. Still feel pretty awesome. Pretty fucking awesome.

screw you world. and in turn, you can screw me. missionary. just the way i like it. lots of spit. happy monday.

and fuck you M !

make this pass ...

like NOW :(

hows that ?

for a kick in the ass ?

and a kick to the ego ?

you asked for it. did you not ?

Chaos.

Lots of it in my head. 

Ummmm ...

Dear new blog interface. You're very confusing.

this is how gay I am ..

on a sunday morning, i am not sexing. i am not sleeping in. i am not brunching. instead, i am cleaning the kitchen, scrubbing the platform and rearranging all the jars.

and i am fucking loving it.

yes. help is needed.

Dude ...

just about when did I get so awesome ?

doing it. living it. loving it.

yay.

that moment ...

when the perfect song plays .. all you need is a book, a cigarette & a really really really nice cup of coffee.

Been having too many of those.

• need to start reading
• need to start smoking again [only for moments like these]
• and need a blessed coffee machine.

loathe this feeling of loneliness. the constant need to have someone to share interesting/exciting moments, achievements. i hate it. why can't I be content by myself ? such great achievements, why can't I enjoy the moment, revel in and celebrate.

bah. just one of those days. one amongst many. but then again, this too shall pass, no ?

Lets get rich and give everybody nice sweaters and teach them how to dance
Lets get rich and build a house on a mountain making everybody look like ants
From way up there, you and I, you and I ....

turns out ..

i did it.

dear someone ...

Lying to four different men that I am dating someone, so I don't have to make small talk and go on dates, when all I'd really really really like, is to actually be dating someone.

Where art thou O' someone ?

this too shall pass ...

.... no ?

it's time to take a U-Turn ....

..... i think.

it helps ...

that you're so fucked up.

only if we could blame everything on you. but then again, there are so many of you.

hungry

and not happy.

like OMFG !

like OMFG !

I am 29.

- SHRIEK -