err Hello !? 1-0-1 , theres an emergency !!!

* achhooo * Summer sucks and so does mozilla firefox tho I am addicted to the latter and cant escape the former. Not this year anyways. This is my third no my fourth attempt at this post cuz stupid mozilla keeps hanging as some java shit keeps loading in some other window and then the entire system restarts. Stupid stupid mozilla.

Its been a week off. An entire week off but not an off. Just recovered from a frenzied fit of illness. Come summer and this is a routine. I successfully dogded the summer for the last two years, alas this year, life had plans to screw me and so it did. I had three migranes since friday. Two consecutive. Sinusitus is at its peak and the acidity is creating designer ulcers in my system and the diet, whatever that was has gone for a toss. Abstinence is so not the word for the season. So I have been home since monday and today as I finally went to work, there was power fuckup and had the day off and tomorrows ma weekly off :) So I had an entire week off and I did what nothing. Slept three days on sleeping pills.

But having been in bed has given loads of time to catch up on lots of friends :) so here they are the interesting titties bitties between Ani [ my b.f.g (babyfaghag) in aussie land - spoke 2 the bitch after three fucking months. whore] and I

me: so whats up with 's'
bfg: she got her permanent residency and a job [full time]
me: O M G, yes I heard. Bitch. I so hate her. I am so jealous
bfg: [in i Told U so tone] errr, u remember u qualified too
me: we r SO NOT GOING THERE. I am unwell. be nice
bfg: I told u so
me: Bitch
me: so whats up with that guy
bfg: who !?
me: arey, that annonying cutlet of a fellow who drove a red toyota and kept piling on
bfg: oooooh, 'a' !?
me: yes him
bfg: breaks into evil laughter
me: and !?
bfg: remember last I spoke 2 u I told u he was staying over at our place
me: err yes, why so, I still havnt be told. He had a house of his own and a wonderful red car with a rather impressive system
bfg: so turns out he and his flatmate 't' were an item
me: oooh la la, 't' the fat chick no, who spoke a mighty lot and laughed a mighty lot
bfg: and they were u know at it and he got her pregnant
me: oooh la la ..... oooooh la la la la
bfg: and then he was like ABORT the child and she was like no, I wanna keep, U need not worry
me: ooooooh, total salam namaste moment
bfg: ooooh, did u see that movie !?
me: ofcourse, its shot in aussie no, how cudnt I !?
bfg: i love that song, " my dil goes "
me: err ani, can we please continiue gossiping, i am unwell here and if I am gonna use my freaking energy, I either be jerking off or gossiping
bfg: bitch
bfg: so, he ddnt want the baby and all so he like kicked her on the stomach
me: he WHAT !?
bfg: yea man, so fucking stupid and then he got thrown out
me: so errr, u gave him shelter !?
bfg: oh, we ddnt know, when we realized we kicked him out too
me: ooooh, so what happened to 't' and her 'paapi aulad'
bfg: oh, I dunno, I was depressed no, no time to catch up on gossip
me: [sulking] but ani
me: are u good for anything !?! Cant even gimme complete gossip. #*#&#*!*@ !!!!
[damn, I tell u, theres nothing worst that incomplete gossip]

moments later

bfg: 'r' yaar I dun think I will not drink anymore
me: yea like where have I heard that before ?!
bfg: no, like we went 2 melbis the other nite and I drank and I drank and I drank and then I threw up and I threw up and I was like fucked for two nites
me: U dun want me to remind u of my birthday nite do u !?[where u sat and slept on the toilet floor for 4 hours] or the nite in uni !? or of the nite @ shooters !?[where u gave rahul body shots] or of the nite @ teri's[where u cried] or of the nite @ my place !?[when i turned u over and asked u to talk so i cud sleep]
bfg: I GET THE POINT. I wont drink anymore.
me: we'll see !

Next day the phone rings - its bfg

me: Ur stalking me again, Either u wont call me for 3 months or u'll call me everyday
bfg: Well, cudnt help, I am doing an assignment
me: muhahahaha, wonder what that feels like, defer it i say, defer it
bfg: ur bad influence
me: ur a tad too late honey
bfg: 'r' can I tell u something, u wont judge me promise !?
me: dahling - shoot it and remember standford line from sex and the city " some people do sports, some people do the arts and craft. we judge "
bfg: so after I spoke 2 u last nite, that 'r' called and I like went to the club, u know I was missing u and all and there I had some 'snakebite' shots
me: omg, I know where this is going. u got drunk and u had drunked sex without a condom
me: whose the father. Just tellme its not 'a'
bfg: o good lord, no. I ddnt have sex
me: phew, if i am not getting any, why shud u !?!
bfg: so i got drunk again
me: uh huh
bfg: and errr
me: ani, u've gotten drunk before. I have cleaned ur puke. I have changed ur clothes. I have slapped u to sleep
bfg: and ummmm
me: u had sex in the open, ddnt u ! ddnt u !? ddnt U !?
me: u kissed the bouncer !? u gave someone a body shot !?
bfg: no
me: then what !?!
bfg: I passed out and that 'r' .. he .. he called an ambulance !!!
me: HE CALLED AN WHAT !?!
me: WHY THE FUCK WOULD ANYONE CALL AN AMBULANCE cuz u got drunk !?
[at this point i just break into this fit of laughter]
bfg: he's only 19
me: SO !? * crying with laughter by this time *
bfg: * cant help laughing too *

so we laughed and we laughed and we laughed and we laughed and we laughed

bfg: damn ! i tell u, those strechers are sure comfortable

I miss u girl. And I miss you loads. The cooking spree's. Those chocolate [read rock] cakes u baked. The [not] yummy chicken curry. And ur ass. The way it moved. Ooohh la la. And most. I miss hugging u to sleep. God Bless you. And hopefully u'll have many more drunken odysseys to narrate. I love u.